And Life Goes ON: Daily Support

Change Page: < 12345678910.. > | Showing page 2 of 14, messages 21 to 40 of 267
Author Message
ElaineQW
  • Total Posts : 4705
  • Reward points : 10730
  • Joined: 4/1/2008
  • Location: San Diego, CA
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 2:10 PM


Sharonma - I don't recall the title of Hay's book, but I was completely stunned when I read that paragraph; and if I remember correctly, it was JUST a paragraph devoted to CANCER!  Arghhhh!!!!

Hug
Elaine
 A person's greatness is the power to stand alone;to be able to make her own choice; in action,to write anew her own law; to choose her own sacrifices; run her own dangers; win her own freedom; venture her own destruction; to choose her own happiness 
 






Rena
  • Total Posts : 6649
  • Reward points : 12660
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: California
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 2:50 PM
I think the Hay book is You Can Heal Your Life.  Someone gave me Bernie Siegel's Love, Medicine and Miracles right after my diagnosis. It was good for me because I tend to approach things very cerebrally, and the book is more spiritual. However, he made that same assertion about attracting cancer to ourselves, which I thought then and still think now is a bunch of b.s.  That was enough to ruin the book for me. 
Rena age 66 California Central Coast
29-year survivor
BRCA2-positive
Dx 1986 IDC ER/PR negative 22 positive lymph nodes
CMFVP chemo weekly for one year, 7 weeks radiation
October 2007: New chassis and spark plugs!

sharonma
  • Total Posts : 4093
  • Reward points : 10530
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 3:23 PM
The book I was thinking of is Your Body Speaks Your Mind, by Deb Shapiro, filled with just as much bs.  It was given to me by a friend who has since died of bc.  But please listen to this crap...
"Many studies have shown that women with bc have developed a tendency toward repressed anger often masked by extra niceness and self sacrifice, while feeling unsupported, inhibited in their sexuality, and unresolved in their conflicts."   And it goes on.  I can't seem to insert the screaming angry smiley, but picture it here
<message edited by sharonma on Wednesday, March 28, 2012 3:24 PM>
dx ILC/dcis excisional biopsy 5/30/08
r segmental mast (partial) snb 6/4
node neg stage1 gr ll
er+/pr- Her2 - Oncotype Dx 11
R mast 9/22/08 w DIEP
tamox,now AI 
BRCA 1 & 2 NEG
davinci hyst/bso,  

Rena
  • Total Posts : 6649
  • Reward points : 12660
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: California
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 4:39 PM
Sheesh! Sharon, that smacks of other such "theories"--such as autism is caused by the mother's withholding love from the child, and other fairly tales. Gee, I'd like to show Ms. Shapiro what some unrepressed anger looks like!
Rena age 66 California Central Coast
29-year survivor
BRCA2-positive
Dx 1986 IDC ER/PR negative 22 positive lymph nodes
CMFVP chemo weekly for one year, 7 weeks radiation
October 2007: New chassis and spark plugs!

ElaineQW
  • Total Posts : 4705
  • Reward points : 10730
  • Joined: 4/1/2008
  • Location: San Diego, CA
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 4:45 PM


Rena/Sharonma -  Hard to believe these were written by women!  Oh, well, I guess I'd better get back to my self-sacrifice (I'm playing Wii with Andreas), my sexual inhibitions (smirk) and my unresolved conflicts (what should I wear to Lucas' birthday dinner tonight - casual or a dressy?).

Hug(s) 
Elaine
 A person's greatness is the power to stand alone;to be able to make her own choice; in action,to write anew her own law; to choose her own sacrifices; run her own dangers; win her own freedom; venture her own destruction; to choose her own happiness 
 






Tricia Keegan
  • Total Posts : 19215
  • Reward points : 13520
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: Ireland
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 5:29 PM
Lol ladies, its good to read so many of us can still see the fun and joy in life despite the sad feelings that have been posted and I agree with Sharon's assumption that there are many strong women here and BC has not managed to beat down!
 
As to the Hays theory I too think this is crap, thats akin to attaching blame to a person for getting the disease, I can't think of anything worse or more dismal a thing to say other than a smoker deserved lung cancer!
 
Anyway getting back to the earlier thoughts and posts I really am so sorry there are so many ladies here feeling saddness and having other issue's with their bodies since having a mast, I did'nt have this op so really cannot put myself where you are but my heart tells me you're all beautiful inside from reading your thoughts and I think the only solution is to accept yourself outside which I hope will happen more easily as time goes on and bring you all a sense of peace. (Easier said than done of course!!)  Sadly none of us asked for this and many have already been lost that we knew, but I think overall we are gaining strides on this disease and perhaps the women of tomorrow will one day not have to face these issue's as many of us do.Pals
Tricia Keegan...From Ireland Dx July '05 IDC 3/9 nodes pos..triple positive..a/c x 4..Taxol/herceptin x 12
Herceptin 1yr ..rads x35 oophorectomy Aug '06
Currently taking Arimidex /Zometa 1 x yearly
Carepage- survivortricia

farla
  • Total Posts : 624
  • Reward points : 6720
  • Joined: 8/30/2009
  • Location: Great Neck, NY
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 7:52 PM
Hi, I am glad I didn't read any of those books. I kept to graphic novels (Cancer Vixen was OK) and happier stuff - try Crazy Sexy Cancer, much more hopeful! We all go through feeling of guilt - yep those 2 joints I smoked in junior high gave me cancer - and we don't need those books to make it worse.
Farla
dx 8/09, R double lumpectomy, invasive mixed DCIS/LCIS
ER + PR + Her -
1/3 Sentinel pos. 1/15 nodes pos
 Stage 2A  Grade 2, Nottingham 6
chemo A/C x4, Taxol x 4 started 9/21/09 DONE!!!
femara  started 2/5/10
rads  2/8/10 DONE!!!
Now - osteoporosis?  Vit D, calcium, and a baby aspirin to boot!

Rose Cafe523
  • Total Posts : 2653
  • Reward points : 6385
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, March 28, 2012 10:23 PM
This post isn't always about being down but if that is where you are that is ok.  I fluctuate being from down to being ok.  I just like to beable to say somewhere,  that is what is going on and be honest with my feelings.  I think with this diagnosis we should be able to be more honest with our feelings and recognize that we aren't always down or always UP.  I think being able to release those feelings both ways is healthy for us. 
   Glad you girls are talking and hope this helps and you continue to do so.  I know I need it and will. 
Rose
 Pink Impacts Forever
5-23-06 DCIS High Grade
Strong family history BC/OVCA
denied(lost appeals)out of network surgery
10-30-06 BM SICA left,DIEP right
Nodes Neg No chemo or rads 
Revisions along with LAVH/BSO/TVT 1-23-08
Biopsies x 3 10/20/08,neg
Bone scan 2/23/11 spot on R frontal and occiptal bone
PET/CT scan 3/4/11 negative

scootersmom
  • Total Posts : 1277
  • Reward points : 12250
  • Joined: 3/30/2011
  • Location: Waukegan, Illinois
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Thursday, March 29, 2012 7:12 AM
Rose:

I agree.  There are days where I have so much to be thankful for and then there are other days where I reflect on what has happened and the uncertainty of the future.  I struggle with the "tightrope" that I seem to be on but I do feel that it isn't as thin as it once was.  I've learned to put on a "mask" to people so that when their words hurt they truly do not see that they have gotten to me.  I won't give anyone that satisfaction.  I prefer to walk away but there have been times lately that I haven't been able to walk away and that is when I am not so tolerant.

I've lost my breasts and I am okay with it.  They were big, heavy and caused my back to hurt.  One had to go and the other just "tagged" along. I thought I would be more in shock when I saw the incisions after the surgery but I was fine.  The doctor's were surprised that I could look without tears or shock.

Everyday is a new day.  There are and will always be people in my life that will never understand everything that I have gone through.  They still don't understand why I still need to see the oncologist and plastic surgeon.  Oh well.

Ladies:  Keep a cheery thought and try to focus on the good things.  Cancer is an evil thing and the more that we think about it the more power it has over us.  I for one and going to try to follow my own advice.  Again--I said try.  

Now I must run.  Time to deal with other stressful things in my life like my coworkers. lol.
Tina    
dx 2/1/11 DCIS
Lumpectomy 2/27 results DCIS/LCIS Stage 0 ER+ PR+
Bi-lateral Mastectomy 4/26 with expanders 
6/3 Surgery to remove contaminated expander due to infection.
7/22/11 Surgery to reinsert the expander. 
10/11/2011 Surgery to replace tissue expanders with implants.
 
 




Rose Cafe523
  • Total Posts : 2653
  • Reward points : 6385
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Saturday, March 31, 2012 10:15 PM
Hi ladies~
    Our weather is so erratic lately.  We have had warmer days than we normally do that has spoiled us.  I would love it to continue as it sure helps with the mood and being able to get outside!! 
      I am trying to keep busy crocheting, doing a little redecorating, making some plans in hopes that my youngest daughter and granddaughter make it here at least for a visit in May from France.  That has its own long story that I won't go in to here.  Just that I try to skype my daugher when my "son in law" is not around. 
     I have to find a way to lose some weight and  get my blood pressure down.  Losing some stress would help.  I am telling myself I am keeping my appt with onc this month no matter what.  Just have to get past it and decide what to do about getting a new one or something.  My job seems to be getting more stressful.  The health care field may be a "stable" job at this time, but they have added so many stressors and expectations, domcumentation, etc  that many of you would not realize the stress it has added and less time for individual care time.  
    Ok, enough of that.  Think I am running out of artificial tattoos.  Must order some more soon.  At least they make me feela little more normal occasionally.  
Rose 
 Pink Impacts Forever
5-23-06 DCIS High Grade
Strong family history BC/OVCA
denied(lost appeals)out of network surgery
10-30-06 BM SICA left,DIEP right
Nodes Neg No chemo or rads 
Revisions along with LAVH/BSO/TVT 1-23-08
Biopsies x 3 10/20/08,neg
Bone scan 2/23/11 spot on R frontal and occiptal bone
PET/CT scan 3/4/11 negative

Tricia Keegan
  • Total Posts : 19215
  • Reward points : 13520
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: Ireland
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Sunday, April 01, 2012 6:24 AM
Rose we've had the same type of weather for a week and when I went for my medical appts last week I was amazed that everyone seemed so much happier than usual and were smiling and saying hello and its definatly the warmth and sunshine that does it but our temps are to dip a lot this coming week.
 
I'm sorry to read of so much stress in your work and really hope your daughter manage's a visit to you in May and perhaps the decorating etc will keep you busy enough to take your mind off the worst issue's that trouble you. Pals
Tricia Keegan...From Ireland Dx July '05 IDC 3/9 nodes pos..triple positive..a/c x 4..Taxol/herceptin x 12
Herceptin 1yr ..rads x35 oophorectomy Aug '06
Currently taking Arimidex /Zometa 1 x yearly
Carepage- survivortricia

chelmsing
  • Total Posts : 111
  • Reward points : 5760
  • Joined: 2/10/2011
  • Location: Madison, WI
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Sunday, April 01, 2012 10:51 AM
Rose - I understand with the weather.  I just felt so much happier when the weather was better a couple weeks ago and now we are back to our norm.  I'm still expecting a big snowstorm yet - this is still Wisconsin.

I also see my onc this month (tomorrow actually) and am debating about changing too.  He switched locations and I don't like the "largeness" of the UW.  I liked it when I could walk in and they would recognize me and check me in for appointments before I even got up to the desk.  If you want to talk oncs here in town, send me a pm.  I'll see how the appointment goes tomorrow. 

What's helped me get through the stress of our "normal" weather and work stuff this weekend was booking our summer vacation plans.  I haven't taken any time off from work for something fun since Oct 1, 2010.  All my time off for the last 1 1/2 years has been for surgeries, dr appts, or not feeling well from surgeries or chemo.  I'm really looking forward to time off for something else.

Cathy
dx 10/28/10, 11/11/10 lumpectomy, 11/24/10 re-excision of margins, 1/17/11 mastectomy
er+/pr+, 2.4 cm tumor & DCIS
2/14/11 4x dose dense AC followed by 4x Taxol
No rads
7/22/11 DIEP reconstruction for right breast

farla
  • Total Posts : 624
  • Reward points : 6720
  • Joined: 8/30/2009
  • Location: Great Neck, NY
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Sunday, April 01, 2012 9:55 PM
Hi Rose and Cathy, and everyone, I agree about the weather. It was so cold and rainy here yesterday. We had a luncheon (with a congressman!) after services, and then it was just too cold to walk to the mah jongg game. Everything is sprouting, and then it gets cold. I hope all the plants do OK. I also liked a smaller office. I went to a general onc for my treatments - and not the big centers. Every time I had a question, one of 2 doctors spoke to me, not one of many many PAs or NPs. It was better than walking into a door under huge C A N C E R signs - like I had to for the "look good feel better" program. But then again, some of those support services, like support groups, or in house nutritionists etc are not there. I just had to walk away from the TV. My hubby was flicking through, and Mad Men was on while he was flipping. These 2 women were talking about going to doctors, and being sick - like someone was going to die, etc. And in true TV fashion, boy did she look good and healthy. I couldn't stand it. Obviously none of the writers have ever experienced this. I was much better watching Star Trek.
Farla
dx 8/09, R double lumpectomy, invasive mixed DCIS/LCIS
ER + PR + Her -
1/3 Sentinel pos. 1/15 nodes pos
 Stage 2A  Grade 2, Nottingham 6
chemo A/C x4, Taxol x 4 started 9/21/09 DONE!!!
femara  started 2/5/10
rads  2/8/10 DONE!!!
Now - osteoporosis?  Vit D, calcium, and a baby aspirin to boot!

Rena
  • Total Posts : 6649
  • Reward points : 12660
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: California
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Monday, April 02, 2012 9:44 AM
Farla, you play Mah Jongg? That brings back memories for me. I remember the sound of the tiles being mixed up on the table and the voices of my mother and her friends: "One bam," "Two dots."  And my favorite part--when they'd break for coffee and cake! I have my mother's mah jongg set, but no one around here plays.  My mother kept her winnings (and she usually won) in her pishka drawer. For the other ladies, pishka is Yiddish for a box that you put charitable donations in. 
Rena age 66 California Central Coast
29-year survivor
BRCA2-positive
Dx 1986 IDC ER/PR negative 22 positive lymph nodes
CMFVP chemo weekly for one year, 7 weeks radiation
October 2007: New chassis and spark plugs!

farla
  • Total Posts : 624
  • Reward points : 6720
  • Joined: 8/30/2009
  • Location: Great Neck, NY
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Monday, April 02, 2012 8:14 PM
Mah Jongg is so big here! It is a great Shabbos (Saturday afternoon when you can't use electricity (TV, computers, phone) or drive or run errands) activity. I also know several women in their 30s who are not religious who play. I think having that one day a week when you're not running around is great for the kids. We'd play board games, or card games or talk. I've told several of my Christian friends to do this on Sundays - just have a family day. It is great for kids to learn interpersonal communication. Anyway, Rena - get a group together and teach them. We play about 1-2 times a week. And gossip. And eat. Much fun!
Farla
dx 8/09, R double lumpectomy, invasive mixed DCIS/LCIS
ER + PR + Her -
1/3 Sentinel pos. 1/15 nodes pos
 Stage 2A  Grade 2, Nottingham 6
chemo A/C x4, Taxol x 4 started 9/21/09 DONE!!!
femara  started 2/5/10
rads  2/8/10 DONE!!!
Now - osteoporosis?  Vit D, calcium, and a baby aspirin to boot!

Rena
  • Total Posts : 6649
  • Reward points : 12660
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: California
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Monday, April 02, 2012 11:15 PM
That sounds great, Farla. We didn't observe Sabbath as we might have. Both my parents had to work on Saturday, and they really didn't have much choice. But I agree that a day of playing games and talking is so nice for a family. We did that a lot when Karen was little. Since she was an only child, she counted on us to play games with her at times. We really enjoyed it. I might try to get some friends interested in mah jongg. 
Rena age 66 California Central Coast
29-year survivor
BRCA2-positive
Dx 1986 IDC ER/PR negative 22 positive lymph nodes
CMFVP chemo weekly for one year, 7 weeks radiation
October 2007: New chassis and spark plugs!

chelmsing
  • Total Posts : 111
  • Reward points : 5760
  • Joined: 2/10/2011
  • Location: Madison, WI
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Tuesday, April 03, 2012 8:30 PM
Farla and Rena - How do you play with other people and tiles?  I'm only familiar with the electronic versions of the game.

Cathy
dx 10/28/10, 11/11/10 lumpectomy, 11/24/10 re-excision of margins, 1/17/11 mastectomy
er+/pr+, 2.4 cm tumor & DCIS
2/14/11 4x dose dense AC followed by 4x Taxol
No rads
7/22/11 DIEP reconstruction for right breast

Rena
  • Total Posts : 6649
  • Reward points : 12660
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: California
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Tuesday, April 03, 2012 9:02 PM
Cathy, the original mah jongg game is from China. The set consists of thick, rectangular tiles with the different symbols on them--they're called bams, cracks, dots, dragons, etc--and they were originally made of ivory. In most modern sets, they're made of some kind of plastic. Each player has a rack to place the tiles on and tries to make "hands" from the tiles--kind of like the hands in gin rummy. The players pick up a tile from the pile on the table, and then discard one--just as you'd do in a game of gin rummy. Each year, the Mah Jongg Federation puts out a card with all the hands for that year. Farla probably can explain that better than I can. 
Rena age 66 California Central Coast
29-year survivor
BRCA2-positive
Dx 1986 IDC ER/PR negative 22 positive lymph nodes
CMFVP chemo weekly for one year, 7 weeks radiation
October 2007: New chassis and spark plugs!

sharonma
  • Total Posts : 4093
  • Reward points : 10530
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, April 04, 2012 6:32 AM
It sounds like a fun game!  I'll have to look for it at the game store in town.  My daughter and her bf brought home a fun game called Catan.  Kind of a cross between Risk and Monopoly.
dx ILC/dcis excisional biopsy 5/30/08
r segmental mast (partial) snb 6/4
node neg stage1 gr ll
er+/pr- Her2 - Oncotype Dx 11
R mast 9/22/08 w DIEP
tamox,now AI 
BRCA 1 & 2 NEG
davinci hyst/bso,  

Tricia Keegan
  • Total Posts : 19215
  • Reward points : 13520
  • Joined: 1/1/2005
  • Location: Ireland
Re:And Life Goes ON: Daily Support - Wednesday, April 04, 2012 5:04 PM
I've never heard of this Rena but it sounds a little like scrabble??
Tricia Keegan...From Ireland Dx July '05 IDC 3/9 nodes pos..triple positive..a/c x 4..Taxol/herceptin x 12
Herceptin 1yr ..rads x35 oophorectomy Aug '06
Currently taking Arimidex /Zometa 1 x yearly
Carepage- survivortricia

Change Page: < 12345678910.. > | Showing page 2 of 14, messages 21 to 40 of 267